Nearing the end...

34 WEEKS!

The end is in sight…but at about two each afternoon, it seems like I can only see the end if I squint really hard, make sure I’m not looking into the light, and stare really hard. If you ask me how I’m feeling, my coined response has been “well, I’m hanging..” (short for “hang in there”). My feet hurt when I stand for too long (probably from the 30 extra pounds I’m carrying), I have these little skin stretching feelings all along my sides, and I just feel heavy.


But, I know it’s all worth it.

I knew I wasn’t going to be one of these women who just love being pregnant. I don’t like being uncomfortable, I don’t like not feeling like myself, I don’t like being tired. I’m a wimp when it comes to all things medical and doctor related. Pregnancy includes all these things and more, and I knew that it wasn’t going to be a walk in the park for me.

That being said, I think the Lord has been very merciful to me. Despite my rocky first 15 weeks or so, I really haven’t had it so bad. Everyone tells me how they had heartburn, reflux, constipation, couldn’t sleep, couldn’t eat, swollen feet, etc. I’ve been blessed to have none of those symptoms. I didn’t even have a technical case of morning sickness. I think the Lord knew that, if I had too much difficulty with this whole pregnancy thing, that I might fight the plan to do have more kids. I’m thankful for that mercy, and thankful for this experience I’ve had. But I’ll be honest, I’m ready for some relief, ready to not waddle when I walk, and ready to meet my son.

Last week I had a doctor’s appointment. Dr. Cope said that, because of my history of high blood pressure, she didn’t want me to go past 39 weeks. So, if there was no action going on by week 39, she would induce. That puts my delivery date a week earlier, around June 6 or 7. On top of that, we started to talk about my preferences for the delivery room. She confirmed that both mom and Dave could be in the room during the actual delivery, pending no complications. We talked about all of the nitty gritty, and somewhat gory details, and put a lot of my fears at rest. It was good to be able to get my mind ready for all that’s about to happen.

Additionally, this past weekend I was able to have some much needed alone time. Up to this point, I had this idea that pregnancy was going to be a super spiritual experience. One where I was going to be reading scripture about babies, praying all the time, and just feeling super connected to the Lord. And while I’ve had moment’s of these feelings, in all reality I’ve been so distracted that I haven’t had the time I would have liked to pray and spend time with the Lord. So, I decided that, at this point, this wasn’t going to happen unless I made it happen. So I told Dave that, this past Saturday, I needed him to leave for a while. And he did. And I spent a good 3 to 4 hours alone in Calvin’s nursery praying for him, for me, for Dave, for the labor and delivery, for our lives together, for all my feelings and fears and thoughts that I have had about being a mom, being pregnant, and the changes that are about to take place. I finished the morning feeling much lighter, less burdened, and ready to finish out the next few weeks of preparation. I gave my fears over to the Lord, and in return, He gave me peace.

The nursery is almost done! I’ve avoided posting any pictures so that you can see the “big reveal” all at once. Hopefully next week I’ll be able to give you a tour (if you can call it that) of Calvin’s nursery, completed and finished and ready for him to come home!